When you have been in a relationship for a long time, many things can change.
You become less tolerant of certain little habits, your onesie becomes a uniform and you regularly fight over the remote. And it is all perfectly normal!
You might also find that your libido has dropped, and you are less in the mood for sex than you used to be.
A low libido is not something that needs to be a part of your relationship, and it is often caused by factors within your lifestyle that are impacting on your sex drive.
Once you identify what these are, it becomes easier to make some simple changes and relight that fire!
1. Mental health
Your mental health will always play a part in your relationship, and it can be a common cause of having little or no sex drive.1
This could be due to issues such as anxiety, depression, low self-esteem or poor body image.
It may also be linked to previous sexual experiences which have negative connotations.
All of these issues can be addressed with the help of a doctor or therapist, so remember, it is good to talk.
2. Your relationship health
We all know that sex changes as our relationship develops.
We get that glorious honeymoon phase where we cannot get enough, before things settle into our own version of normal – whatever that might be.
However, when our relationship is not going to plan, it can change how attracted we feel to our partners.
If you have an ongoing argument or problem, trust issues or poor communication about your sexual needs, then it is far less likely that you are going to want to leap into bed with your other half.
Dealing with these underlying issues will help to improve many aspects of your relationship, including a decreased libido.
You are what you eat, and your diet can be the cause of low libido in men and women.2
We all know that oysters help you come on strong, but did you know that certain foods can we reference this please
minerals are lost, and these can have a huge effect on your libido.
Artificial sweeteners such as aspartame, which is typically found in diet drinks, can affect your serotonin levels, which be responsible for low libido in women and men.3
Zinc is thought to be a natural aphrodisiac and is found in crab, lobster, red meat, certain breakfast cereals and pine nuts so these can be a natural male and female libido booster.
We all know drugs are bad kids, but do you really know all the reasons why?
Cannabis can decrease testosterone levels for up to 24 hours, which will in turn, reduce the sex drive.4
Regular use of the drug can therefore have a long-term impact on your libido.
Whilst many might use a cheeky drink to get them in the mood, overdoing it will work against you.5
Alcohol is a depressant and will dampen the male and female libido, as well as affecting a man’s ability to achieve and maintain an erection.
Beer is actually one of the worst culprits for this due to the way it affects the liver’s ability to get rid of excess hormones.
Time is often citied as one of our worst enemies in the bedroom.
We can easily fall into the trap of prioritising things like work, children and hobbies, leaving us with little time or energy for our partners when it matters most.
You can combat this by making sure that you set aside time together through date nights or setting the alarm early in the morning to make sure you both still feel wanted.
How to boost your libido
There are all sorts of ways that you can boost your libido, and some of them are certainly weird and wonderful.
‘Have you tried these weird libido boosters?’ has some great tips for you to try and increase your sex drive in a fun way!
There are also a number of different male and female libido supplements available that can help to give you an extra boost in the bedroom, but it is important to look at whether there are any other changes you could make to your lifestyle to give you both a helping hand.
Author: Bhupesh Panchal, Regulatory Affairs
Bhupesh started his career as a clinical toxicologist for Public Health England, advising healthcare professionals all around the country on how to manage clinical cases of adverse exposure to supplements, pharmaceuticals, cosmetics, industrial chemicals and agricultural products. After 7 years in this role and a further year working as a drug safety officer in the pharmaceutical industry, Bhupesh joined Holland & Barrett as a Senior Regulatory Affairs Associate in 2019.
In his spare time, Bhupesh likes to cycle and has been learning to speak Korean for several years.
Last updated: 18 December 2020